I Should Be A Life Coach

Everybody has problems. I should be getting paid to tell them so!

I know a life coach. At first glance, he does not seem like a very good one though. Phrases that are frequently heard coming out of his mouth include, “Suck it up”, “Get over yourself”, and “Life sucks, so deal with it.” These are heard on a friendly day. Other comments may include, “You did this to yourself”, “Maybe if you weren’t so damn stupid”, and “Get your head out of your rear”(often said with more expletives). He does not seem to be very motivational in any way, shape or form. He is highly inappropriate, he is rude, and he really doesn’t seem to care how people react to what he says.

Surprisingly, I admire that.

Partly, I admire it because I have similar traits. More so, I respect it because people are paying him to say these things to them.

The comments above sound vaguely similar to parenting (or it should, at least), but they also apply to life choices as an adult. Yes, as a parent you want to be supportive, but you also need to correct your kids to keep them on track when they stray outside their lane. Like so much in the world that has changed, this is something that is missing in our lives as adults. Political correctness has taken away the effectiveness of corrective language.

Gone are the days where if you were stupid someone would likely tell you just how stupid you were. If you did something dumb, you were called out for it. Because of the kinder, gentler, “everyone gets a trophy” generation, things that need to be said are no longer getting said, so people have lost their way in the world, or at the very least, in the workplace.

Sometimes people need to hear the truth.

I used to think motivational words were what we needed to hear to lift us up when we are down. More so now, I think we need to hear things that really need to be heard. Motivation is good at times, but much of it is just feel good fluff because only you can motivate yourself. If you are having trouble figuring our what is wrong in your life, you could be dealing with a, “you can’t see the forest through the trees” attitude. But, maybe your world is so clouded you don’t even know there are trees in your forest. You need to hear it from someone else.

An outside perspective views things differently.

There are things I do that I am not aware of. I know I have issues. I display certain behaviors at times that may cause others to not want to be around me. How do I know? Because someone probably told me so at some point. If someone didn’t call me out to tell me I’m being a jerk, or annoying, or whatever, I probably would not know how I was acting. My response may vary in general as to whether or not I care what they have to say if I didn’t ask their opinion, but if I am paying to solicit life advice from a “professional” about what I’m doing wrong in life, what they are saying better be what I need to hear in order to change my ways.

Being friendly only goes so far. Sometimes you need that reality check to change your course. When it comes to life coaching I think it’s pretty much the same thing. If someone’s life sucks, there may be a very apparent reason why. Sugar coating the reason when inquiring is not going to change anything. Someone needs to say exactly what needs to be said, whether it hurts or not.

I used to think I wanted to be a therapist to help others regain control of their lives, but what I learned over the years is a therapist is not going to tell you what you need to hear. They are not going to be critical of you, nor will they provide the answers you seek, because that is not their job. Their goal is to help you look inward to figure out thoughts and feelings for yourself. You vent, they listen. There is a time and place for therapy, but it’s not a catch-all solution to many of life’s dilemmas.

Life coaching is the opposite of therapy. It is far more blunt, looking at your life from the outside perspective. Life coaching is about listening, but also telling you specifically what you need to do to change (thus, the name coaching). This includes identifying the failures you’ve endured thus far, what you need to do to enact change, what you are doing, and whether or not it’s a realistic plan. It’s about being honest with others. This seems far more valuable to me, and worth a fair price if done correctly.

The next time someone looks you in the eyes and says, “You know what your problem is?”, pause for a moment and ask them to elaborate. It just may be what you need to hear, and maybe the advice will be free, but if you have money burning a hole in your pocket and you need someone to tell you what’s wrong with you, know that I’m here for you and I’m happy to take your money. I will have no issue telling you what your problems are. 😉

~ Marty ~

If you’re not subscribed to my blog, that’s a problem. Don’t make me call you in front of all my followers… Do the right thing and subscribe if you haven’t already.