Holiday Shopping: Tis the Season For Chaos

Behold: the holidays, when ordinary humans become unhinged treasure hunters of truly mediocre items.

Every December, humanity collectively forgets that the items we are wrestling strangers for—fuzzy socks, boxed chocolates, personal hygiene box sets, and oddly scented candles, are typically available every single day of the year. Suddenly, a mug that says “Warm Wishes” becomes the Holy Grail, and we will elbow our way through a seasonal display like it’s a once-in-a-lifetime archaeological find. The same blanket we ignored in June? Now it’s a rare textile treasure woven by the holiday gods and priced at 20% off, which somehow increases our emotional attachment.

Stores know this, of course. They could stack these products to the ceiling, but instead they place exactly twelve of them on a table so our brain whispers, “This is limited. Fight for it.” And we do. We absolutely do. We turn into competitive holiday athletes, sprinting for deals on lotion sets we don’t even like. The irony? The moment January 2nd hits, these items will be sitting lonely on clearance racks, begging to be adopted, and we’ll walk past them like they’re ghosts of poor decisions past.

But here’s where it gets funnier: our holiday adrenaline convinces us these items possess magical, life-changing powers. A scarf becomes a token of emotional intimacy. A box of peppermint bark becomes a symbol of thoughtfulness and class for someone you probably haven’t talked to in months. A novelty blanket shaped like a tortilla suddenly becomes the gift—because in December, mediocrity wrapped in cellophane transforms into a treasure worthy of its own holiday movie subplot.

December doesn’t change the products. It changes us.

And yet, beneath all the peppermint-scented chaos, we’re not actually fighting for the stuff. We’re fighting for the feeling—the little spark that says, “Hey, I found something that will make someone smile.” It makes us willing to tackle a grown adult for a novelty throw pillow that definitely exists in March… all because we want to give someone a moment of joy.

So yes, the items are available year-round. But the intention, the silliness, the shared chaos—that only happens now. And maybe that’s what makes the whole ridiculous spectacle worth it. In the end, the gift isn’t the fuzzy socks or the candle. It’s the story we get to laugh about later… and the reminder that even in our most unhinged moments, we’re all just trying to make each other feel a little more loved. And maybe that’s the point: kindness shouldn’t need a calendar. Make the people in your life smile on ordinary Tuesdays, not just the big holidays. Show up, check in, share joy in small doses all year long—those are the gifts that actually last.

And if all else fails, don’t overthink the holidays – Pizza always make the perfect gift (at least for me). Just make sure you get the right size (extra large!).

Go forth and be festive.

Happy Holidays!

~ Marty ~

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