Tag: funny
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Eating Smart: What They Really Meant
If you’re on a diet, you can still eat pizza… Just eat 3 slices instead of 6! (Look at the Picture) Follow my blog for more great dieting tips like this and other amazing posts you didn’t know you needed in your life!
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When I go on Wheel of Fortune…
Game shows like “Who Wants to be a Millionaire” kick you off the show for getting an answer wrong, but on Wheel of Fortune, I’ll at least have a chance with my well thought out guesses… It’s going to be so much fun when I go on Wheel of Fortune, but I can’t help but…
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Getting Married? Choose the BEST First Dance Song
The symbolic first dance at a wedding reception sets the musical tone for your new life together, but before you tell the DJ to play that special song, make sure it’s the right one. Perhaps the chorus of your favorite song has some words which resonate with your mushy feelings. Maybe “your” song was the…
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If Dogs Could Talk…
If your dog could speak human words, what would they say? Here’s an interpretation of how a conversation might go with your dog. This post is adapted from a funny meme I saw recently: Dog: What Doing? Me: Nothing. I just stood up. Dog: Where Go? Me: I’m going to get a drink. Dog: Can…
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An Open Letter to Publisher’s Clearing House…
This is an open letter to anyone at Publisher’s Clearing House regarding why I’ve not yet received any of my promised prize money. Do you know how many times I’ve sat at my window, watching for the prize patrol van to pull up at my house? One time I thought it was you, but it…
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Mmm… Radioactive Pizza
If the world experienced another nuclear meltdown, how would the pizza taste? Inquiring minds want to know… “Just try it”, they said..”You’ll be fine”. “But, the pizza is glowing.” “Oh come on, man up. What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, right?” “Oh, alright. What’s the worst that could happen.” – Another oddity from the…
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I’m Going To Nigeria
With so many Nigerian princes and banks trying to find Americans to share their unclaimed wealth and inheritance, I want to make it easier for them… Sending these unsolicited e-mails to millions of strangers seems like such a hassle for those writing them, but I have a plan to simplify the process. Whether it’s a…
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OCR: Obsessive Compulsive Recycling
Recycling is generally good for everyone, but things can get interesting when obsessive compulsiveness is thrown into the mix. Like many other Americans, I recycle because it’s the right thing to do. I routinely recycle far more than what I put in my trash can. Does this make me special? Not really, but it’s how…
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How a defective straw made my day…
We get so wrapped up in the craziness of life we often miss the little things. When you find some of those little things, life is so much better. I hadn’t been to McDonald’s in long time. Despite my better judgement, my kids convinced me to go. While waiting for the food to be brought…
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A Fast Food Curiosity
This story isn’t really anything important. It’s just something I thought of while enjoying some fine dining recently. I was in Wendy’s restaurant a few days ago. I saw they had a dollar deal on fries. When I was at the counter I told the cashier I’d like an order of fries. She asked me…
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Can I Have Lunch With President Trump Like Kanye West Did?
On 10/11/18, rapper and national village idiot Kanye West had a “working lunch” with President Trump to discuss critical issues affecting our nation. For anyone who knows Kanye West, including White House staffers, this should have immediately raised a few red flags that something stupid was coming. For whatever reason despite common sense saying otherwise,…
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What’s Wrong with People #1
I decided to start a series titled “What’s Wrong with People”. Why? Because I’m tired of trying to figure out what the heck is wrong with people. Maybe someone else has an answer. I’d been thinking of doing a “stupid things people do” article for a while, but I’ve been sidetracked (shiny things, loud noises,…
Words with Pizza - Featuring Marty the Pizza Guy 